Last week, by an inexplicable quirk of fate, I spent a night watching 3 films, back to back, all of which featured the lovely Ms. Russo as female lead.

Don't know whether it was the half bottle of rum that accompanied this cinematic excercise, or just sheer celluloid euphoria, but I've come up with a dazzling new theory. Before I get into details, some brief (I promise) background info.

The festivities commenced with Tin Cup, where Renee has sex with a dysfunctional golf pro. Dysfunctional, since he preferred to while away his time in a beer stained undershirt, instead of being out on tour. Said golf pro went on to almost win the US Open.

Next in line was Get Shorty, were Renee has sex with a dysfunctional mobster. Dysfunctional, strictly by mafia standards, because he wants to chuck it all and become a film producer. Said mobster goes on to produce a film with a leading Hollywood star.

Last of all was The Thomas Crown Affair, where Renee has sex with a dysfunctional millionaire-playboy. Dysfunctional, because said millionaire was swiping musty old masterpieces to alleviate the boredom of counting his millions. He goes on to swipe Ms. Russo instead. Last seen, they were both headed off camera towards more steamy sex, and a sequel called The Topkapi Affair.

I trust, gentle reader, you see the pattern here.

As for the hope I talk about in the title... literally hundreds of people will testify to the fact that when it comes to interacting with the rest of society, I'm dysfunctional.